I usually hate reality shows. I liked the very first Survivor all those years ago, but the assault following in the past years has been a torrent of horrible humiliation and display of human stupidity and lack of real meaning.

So why the hell am I bringing up Wife Swap, another seemingly sexist, banal concept for a reality show: swap the wives of two families, the first week the woman has to follow the ways of the original household, the second week she gets to reorganise things the way she’d like them. Because, like any good show the producers have written into the show some kind of story or sense of drama, and like any good reality show will have some sort of biting social commentary.

Tonight’s was a winner. Racist, foul mouthed, fatty Dee who didn’t have the word discipline in her vocabulary put into a “coloured man’s” household where dinner was cooked, dishes were cleaned and the kids were well behaved. Meanwhile, Sonja had to deal with one 18 year old brat who calls her a “black bitch” and one 16 year old who adored her as she attempted to stop the kids from swearing, respect their parents, exercise and take them to a hip soul club. The differences were extraordinary and highlights how two such varying families can live in the same city.

Sometimes you can’t ever know yourself until you throw yourself into another world (even if that world is just a few blocks away). While the exercise was a huge wake up call for Dee and her husband, suddenly their life seemed shabby, stagnant and trapped in an endless cycle of microwave dinners and rooms filled with clutter, for Sonja and her partner it was a reinforcement of how good their values are and in the end decide to get engaged. Ironic considering that at the beginning the obstinate Dee was quite clearly racist (as she looks through the fridge and finding coconut cream decides these people are certainly “not English.”)